THE VERY STRANGE DAY BY MARK ANTONY RAINES COMEDY FRIENDLY ZOMBIE PRODUCTION 2019

                                       PROLOGUE                                                  Have you ever had a day  so strange  that  if you  told anyone  thier  would  say you  were making  it up.Well the following  is based  on a very strange day  I had in my home town of Holsworthy Devon                                          MORNING                                                                                       Someone moves has moved in to the town of Holsworthy a new necropolis/Hamlet the local community busy body knows  nothing about them..Thieves steal a valuable antique from a local museum The famous St Peter's Chalice that said process of ability to combat The power of evil.The next day after the theft in the Museum and the  statue of St Peter  in the town square has a mysterious riddle carved into it ,the writing appears to be a combination of old forgotten Devon dialect..Suddenly some Miners appear from up from the newly formed drill hole saying in very excited voices that their had  uncovered something while digging.Someone in town is a thief. Is entering the local council officers to find  the last remaining evidence of the St .Peter's chalice. An energy based creature runs amok in the park wrecking the trees and freaking everyone out by wrecking machinery and gadgets.                                                                                            .                                                                                        Villains kidnap the mayor’s children. To try to get A ransom but discover to their  got y the wrong child so their bribe the wrong child with lot of sweets and leg it.A newly arrived diplomat has to take a dangerous journey to a hostile area of the mean back streets of Glebelands in Holsworthy to try and sort out the parked car situation as it's may end up as world war Three.  All that and happen a after Breakfast.                                        AFTERNOON                                                                                             At the local  haunted house is said to have valuable treasure inside. But to paranormal investigation specialist Mark it's just yet another dead end.Merchants show up at the Wednesday market , claiming to sell the finest merchandise of matchstick models in the land but it turns out it's just some matchsticks glued together as some very poor attempt at modern art .A child wanders out deep into the woods and declares he just returned from being abducted by little green aliens and night is quickly approaching and he is shitting himself as their my return.Strange noises are coming from the forest late at night but nothing was found but a bunch of clothes on the floor must have been a bit of how is your father  .An innocent man who was being  blamed  for  being  just too weird  to be living in  Holsworthy  was  imprisoned or awaiting execution, pleads for help to his surrounding  neighbours but fall on deaf ears.jealous rival threatens of my cat has is trying  to stop   her marriage to her beloved owner but it's too no avail as  it's deemed by many as just  normal  in the modern era we live in  today in blighty or England  to any American  reader of my bizarre day. .A hero has to come up with money for a relative’s operation raised  by eating a meal in all the places where  you can  buy and eat such meal in Holsworthy which  if you  visit  is quite a lot  so be prepared  to loosen that belt .On the opening day of a new business, nothing goes right due to the fact  the local paper boy forgot to put the flyers  through  the  doors of every home  so the poor business   person  was left alone with 1000 custard tarts  just to theirselfs.  Derby  man whom I bump into in the town square  recounts his adventures in the days of yore which  I politely  nod my head  in the  right places  and make up my excuse  I am late for work  and walk very quickly away from as it was such a bore.                              EVENING                                                            A girl is taking cupcakes to school but finds she’s one short due to the fact  it was taste tested  by myself  and it was yummy in my tummy .An  local inventor builds a robot – but the robot starts doing things it’s not supposed to like speaking  in a Devon dialect  saying  things  like  alright  my bird .Lovers  are about to get married at St.Peters  church   – until a long-lost suitor suddenly shows up whom  was presumed dead after  a unfortunate accident  involving  a plastic  bag  in some weird  sex act ,things  got a bit heated  some fisty  cuffs were  involved  but end ended  well  as the happy couple  went off  to  their  honeymoon  in Bournemouth .A hero trained in the martial arts  of the local karate  club Gesar  Karate decides   go on a quest for an ancient artifact as he nowt else to do but watch  Naff  television. .A suitor  called Brain gets humiliated in front of a crush ;a young  woman  in her twenties  whom gives him a cold blue steel  stare and some colourful  language  to go away. .A people in danger quickly accept a new leader called Simon  and occultists , who’s not what he appears aa he has  the power to open spiritual  gateways to the other realm.A Holsworthy Collage student has to pass a class – or risk dire punishment of detention for the rest of his  life .Family disapproves of a young one’s career choice. of wanting  to be the person  that puts the thingy on thinybob that helps cogs turn the machinery  about round. A band of eccentric amateurs enter a local talent contest at the local comedy club calling themselfs the Holsworty mafia to no one amazement  after watching  this really  bad act that it won't frist  prize a free  match ticket  to see the local team at their  new home ground.  Tourists get caught in a country’s revolution as Devon  declares  it's independence  from  England  due to fed up with  the  government  of day not getting  us out of  Europe. .A couple has to deal with sudden or pending arrival of a child from  hell who is  just  only  just  five  years old but is a proper  little monster. .A mythical artifact  the cracked teapot must be protected – or the world will be plunged into disaster or so the curse  on its side says .Big game is coming up with the odds against the hometown team as it's against  the  mighty Arsenal  in a friendly  to help  raise  funds  for  thier  new ground. .A dishonest merchant seeks to eliminate his competition literally by just  killing  them all which is slightly  over the top in the small  market  of only  seven  stalls.                                                          TEA                                                                . A heroic resistance struggles against a seemingly invincible superpower of a villian being able to release incredible loud  foul smelly farts but only  if  eaten some beans and the villian  was stopped  when  one of the hero's managed  to put a cork up the villians bum.The pre school children build a snowman which suddenly comes to life and breaks in a song and dance and the children  have a great  time joining  in until  the  magical  snowman  melts in the heat of the  day .A search starts for a friend who disappeared years ago called  Harbottle whom was always there when i was lonely or felt unwell and we would play for ages ;Harbottle  wishes he could  come back and play but I have  grown  up now and no longer  need  my imaginary  friend. The local mafia  power is constructing a superweapon of which the like the world  has never  seen it be ready in a few weeks which in Devon terms us a long way off .A new family has  moved in across the street who seem very   weird as never come out during the day and seem very pale in colour anx dont like the smell of garlic.Someone I know  locally  who’s lived a sheltered life is suddenly thrust out into the world due to government  cutbacks and is not looking forward to it.Rory the snob publicly insults everyone  who is  not as financially well off.Two friends have not spoken in years and a third party intervenes as it silly falling  out over which goes on frist the jam or cream on a scone.Nation  of Sfath  is  under attack sends calls for help from neighboring peoples but only get sorry the person you are ringing  is out  please leave your name and number after the tone.A troupe of dancers suddenly starts performing inside a subway station to raise  money  for  the  local  youth club  in Holsworthy  and only  raise  five pence.     NIGHT                                                              .Coconut cream pies become self-aware and attack humanity then awake  from  my dream. .Someone gives birth.Someone dies such is life's circle. .A narrator talks about why a keepsake is so important. or as i the writer  tend to go off the plot of book  as it just makes it more intestesting to read well in his head at least.Pessimist exists amongst a group of optimists and that's Brexit  explained.as then .An optimist hangs out with many pessimists to finalise  the  deal  of either a general election or people's  vote or no Deal  but still not decided  either  way  yet..A far-fetched conspiracy turns out to be true yes we did not land man on the moon as you  see it was a dog cosmonaut  that landed frist  but no country  wanted  admit  that  to us the general public.  Soldiers find ways to keep busy in peacetime by peeling lots of potatoes.A  centric artist moves to a small remote town of which  she believes Holsworthy  to be  that likes thier solitude and is greatly pleased  as it's very  easy going and  quiet  ninety nine per cent of the  time.  intellectuals get targeted by those in power as the youngsters of the day are like walking zombies on thier moblephones.Patient under hypnosis recalls facts of an unsolved mystery of the famous  pasty recipe but when  is awoken  forgets it all.Famous historical figures switch places as it a play based on a very  strange book  by author Mark Anthony Raines   called  a very strange day                                        END                                                             And finally the  day has ended and I be glad  to be in in my bed to sleep  just  hoping  surely  will  not get  another very strange day? Is there  a book  2 who cares*