Keyworker by Mark Antony Raines

Keyworker 

By Mark Antony Raines

Comedy Friendly Zombie Ltd.

Contents

Prologue

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Chapter 9

Chapter 10.

Prologue 

It started as a living nightmare as if humanity had stepped headfirst into a Zombie Apocalypse film.

It was also like nature was copying from the book by H. G Wells, War of  The Worlds  in which the common cold killed the Martian invasion.

This time it was the reverse as a smaller than a very tiny speck of a dot with spears surrounding it looking under the telescope like a set of trumpets.

This was not a germ which has been with humanity since the beginning of our creation from ape to man, this was a virus which became to be known by two names, Covert -19, Coronavirus.

This was going to change everything about Tom  our hero a world and the rest of the world with him.

No one truly knew where the virus started but many a conspiracy theory were produced from a monkey escaping a secret lab then biting an unexpecting passer-by and then transferred from this host to others.

The other was its mutations of the various virus inside bats, it seems it was the bats turn to take the rap for a global plague, at least the rats were having a party as it was normally their fault.

Perhaps it was just destiny as if you studied your history books instead of thinking about completing the next level if your latest video game you would see that history has a habit like the British Broadcasting Corporation for repeating it's self.

Chapter 1

Where to start I suppose I could go for the classic once upon a time or one of my favourites from the world of film.

Far away in a far off galaxy but that goes against the accepted norm for writing a book for this about an event that changed all we knew about our world and all the concepts of society as we once knew it.

People soon developed into two groups almost like living out their inner Lord of the Flies inner scenario.

The two groups were as follows the one's willing to accept what their government was doing in dealing with this modern-day plague by doing their best to make sure to put ideas into action.

The others were the ones who knew what was going on but always thinking of a loophole's of getting past the bases of the government outlines for their own benefit of pleasure, money.

I going to go of piece here and rant a little so if you have brought this book or reading free via app please just skip this part I really don't mind.

So here comes the rant bit, when did going out or earning money become more important than all our most important thing Life, never thought I would see that in my limited time frame on this planet Earth.

You can't take money or having a good time with you when you go on your trip to the other realm, I wonder if Heaven or Hell practice social distancing of 6 metres or from people like myself two shopping trolleys in distance.

Right back to the book folks about bloody time I hear you say.

Tom was just sitting in his broom cupboard thinking of ways to avoid doing hard graft as he had done since he was a child, his school report read well at least you attended school well except for every Friday as you liked a long weekend. Pity you were just too busy scheming ways of getting out if lessons as it may explain your grades which were all a sound F.

Tom was just dunking his chocolate biscuit into his time when over the local radio station a news report came in of a man in China dying of mystery virus which affected his breathing.

To put this in the back of his head as he only really enjoyed the sports news except for when his football team he had been supporting losing again and you got is the distant memory Hoe hum such is the glory of life.

So Tom went back to his cup of tea and biscuit in his broom cupboard.

Many miles away and a very long swim and tiring on your arms and legs and an awfully long time to wait for your clothes to dry out if the sun has got its sun out and has come out to play.

A thin man wearing metal-rimmed glasses and thinning hair; reached over to buy his annual bit of fruit from the market when he lets out a spray of a cough; inside this coughing is a very small virus totally invisible, none judgement who it jumps onto to be its next host.

The Market Trader went home from a successful day of trading, over the next couple of days he developed a continuous cough, high fever and was struggling to speak due to being out of breath, he put this to the back of his head and carried on working at his stall until one day he failed to turn up for his market pitch.

So the new plague began

Chapter 2

Over next couple of weeks, rumours were all over the social media about a new plague about to hit the world as some saga wise old man and just to be politically correct in this world woman said some six hundred years ago that something awful was going to happen in 2020 expect if you were going to be a bit of a stickler you should read the last book of the Bible which has been telling us about the end of the world and the four horsemen, sorry no mention of it being woman, of the Apocalypse.

So the virus who really wanted to be known by a much cooler name then coronavirus as he thought Vcough was a more high class and he thought he and his kind had been getting a bit of a bad rap so he talked to a nice man who had goat feet and played pan pipes and after some bargaining, a plan was hatched, he Vcough would become as famous as his distant cousins Spanish and Black and that fellow he made a deal with I think his name was morningstar would boast his soul account, win, win situation for the both of them.

.

Chapter 3

Tom finished up for the day, left his broom cupboard, closed and locked the door and then walked pass the headmistress office door and nearly got away from not seeing her when he heard her golden brummie accent saying.

"Tom can I see you for a moment please!"

Tom thought about just legging it and dealing with the hassle the next day but it was far too late for that as Ms Reid with her fading red hair do yourself hair dye, thick metal rimmed glasses, and pear shaped body was stood right in front of him.

Vcough was getting a bit lonely inside his host bodies plus he wanted to be infamous in the annals of historical events so he did what his family always told him to do in times of need he self replicate himself a thousand fold and by giving the host a nasty cough he knew that droplets produced would infect the next host if within two metres or in old money ,just looking up on Google Chrome other web browsing sites are available,6 feet 6.74  inches 

So now Vcough had company of mini version s of himself; he loved this because he was a bit of a egoist .

Tomorrow sitting in Ms Reid office  felt to him like the  old days when  he was a much younger and better looking  version of himself. 

He was forever  being  sent to  the Headmaster s office  normally  to get the cane but surely  that not the case  this very moment of time in the realities of the theory of time which  is could include  in this  book  but it be very long and boring and no doubt  like me you will fall asleep and never  come back to my book.

Ms Reid spoke.

"I am sorry Tom to inform  you  due the current global events in am going to have to furlough you "

Furlong care of Wikipedia  

leave of absence, especially that granted to a 

member of the services or a missionary.

"a civil servant home on furlough"

verbUS

grant leave of absence to.

"furloughed workers"

Tom just  let out a sigh  of  relief  at least  he was not given the sack or even  worse  smacked  against  his hand or his bottom. 

Chapter 4 

 

Coughing; breathlessness can be heard  around the  world .

Vcough sitting in his Red leather chair with its twenty four caret gold leaf and gothic wooden background if you the reader are wandering  how this is possible it's a book and my imaginationings  from my Manic ;Parnoid :O.C.D ;Small vessel disease of the brain which affects my cognitive skills brain  so thier ;at this point  of writing  in am poking  my tongue attached you  the reader :yes it's pretty. 

Tom has been sitting at home  watching  endless  back to back  Netflix and Amazon  boxsets and films;eating junk food and just  generally feeling  self dissatisfied with his and really grating  on his partners nerves; Tom not the marriage type  more the if times get too hard I please excuse my french  fuck  off.

One one of his really  extra lazy days he even urinates  into an empty  water bottle as getting  up and walking  the stairs is like real hard effort man.

Vcough dispite his godly status among  his fellow  virus chums was just  getting a little  bored as the infamy  he seeked was not coming as quickly as he frist  thought so he thought seeing  he was a virus and told by no less then orange hair and faced fellow by the  name of Donald Trump that he was very smart .

Vcough let's change the  game  to when my hosts finally  succumb to my virus friends  I make so is more fifty fifty  just  to throw the scent off the top scientific research communities of the world by one person  gets a weaker version the other a nice three weeks stay at your  nearest  intense  care unit ending on ventilation and a high risk of knocking  on St .Peters Pearly Gates. 

Tom was snorting and speaking  in his sleep  due to the weird dream. 

The dream 

"White Clouds on a bright blue sky ;birds flying : only the sounds  of  birds song  in the atmosphere. A black shadow  is in the far corner saying  these  words rerekrow a emoceb backwards  I sure the more intelligent  among the  readers would  notice that was a classic form of backwards  writing. '

It really say become a keyworker and with that he startled back  from  his slumber either that or the cold water poured over him by his partner out of frustration. 

Chapter 5

To celebrate the fact   Tom found  his way of being  a keyworker as the person  who  wipes down the shelves in a supermarket.

He made his partner  go with  him against  the government's  advice of essential travel  only:go to  the  nearest  twenty miles  away  Iceland s to get 50 burgers 50 pre cooked chicken wings and thighs so thier could  cook it all up for  thier neighbourhood; you  may think this was a noble gesture but it was a massive flop as not one soul turn up which meant  rather then throw away  valuable  food it's was cold burgers or chicken  for  the  next couple of days :yummy  for your  tummy  not!

Vcough finally had his army of  mini me;s ready to break into  thier hosts ;he had come up with a cunning plan to  fool the hosts who were called Scientist .

Vcough plan was a simple  but ingenious  idea ;instead  of  affecting the  host bodies with the  same symptoms he made it a fifty  _fifty by giving some hosts just a mild form and others authorised more life  threatening form. 

Vcough knew  this would  make him  more scary as no one would know  what version thier would get,he let out a maniacal laugh. 

Tom was just about to get ready for his very first day on his new job at Way get 

Supermarket when as he was sitting  in his kitchen eating his three wheatabix; at this point  I told to tell you other breakfast cereals are available due product placement  rules;don't you  hate red tape.

I always thought if red tape  has its superior who tells  it what  to do .

"This is the Superior  of the Red Tape I like  mention  that red tape  is want made this country great as without  be total anarchy "

Tom could feel a drop of water dripping down  from  the  ceiling :he rushed  upstairs like a greyhound on heat:turned off the shower then went back downstairs back to the kitchen .

In the kitchen was a small  puddle of water, Tom looking at his ceiling realised  he have to sort it out and take down  the lights and switch the power off the shower and oven and kitchen lights.

Just at this very moment as if she had some built in radar for knowing  something was  up. 

Toms partner walked into the  kitchen and all hell was let loose giving poor Tom;well in Toms mind; 

After a severe bashing of the ears and much grovelling and up teen cups of tea and I am sorry it was all my fault, Tom did try to blame the shower  being on due to the cat leaping  onto the shower cord causing  it to turn on due to the cats bodyweight which  in turn  frightened said cat who leap into  the  air and whilst in mid landing  caught  the shower head and as  the cat fell one its paws hit the on stitch button which in turn turned sad shower on.

Wow that was worthy  of filming it for You Been Framed_ This bit is care of my old pal Wikipedia _Viewers around the UK send in their home videos of friends, family and pets doing amusing or embarrassing things. 

All this would have  been a wonderful  but for one thing that Tom forgot  in his Cock and Bull tale_far-fetched and fanciful story or tale of highly dubious validity also cock-and-bull story.

Here comes the butt I reckon most readers  of this book probably saw a mile away.

Tom and his Partner Endha did not owe a cat and never had.

So Tom went to his frist job with two very red ears and a quiet dismeanor. 

Chapter 6

Tom frist  job was to get the reels of red and white striped tape placed on the supermarket  lino floor ; place said  tape in a straight line then do the same again at a distance of two metres _or six foot and seven inches in old imperial. 

The distance of two metres is deemed  to be a same distance as a cough or a sneezing normally gets weakened  by time it gets to the next person although like all science  it gets debated  to death  of right  or wrong  ;anyway thought Tom he is just  going to  do his job and this time just keep  is wild conspiracy theories to myself. 

Tom did not really understand the social distancing as most of his life spent thier time avoiding  him so he thought  it was quite  normal. 

Vcough was liked the  idea  that the hosts had little  graphics showing  his progress as he was awaiting  his moment  of being historic virus epidemic. 

Vcough  was a genuinely get a bit worried  when one of his inhabitanted hosts a old fellow  with a dodgy wig and orange skin who told the people under  him about  how we clever viruses were becoming  but Vcough soon sighed  with  relief of this president being  taken seriously when  he told the word that if you  injected yourself  with bleach it would  get rid of his Vcough disciplines. 

"Disclaimer Please do not inject your body  with bleach as you  will get very  ill or dead.

As thier say in wrestling don't try this at home _I the author of this book in no way legally advise you  do anything  with  bleach  bar following information and instructions laided out by the manufacturer :Wow sorry  about that just  want to get sued or worse  some idiot did something stupid. "

Vcough sensed  his powers  were  becoming  stronger as he knew only in complete military or police state that lowdown  for some was a way to be against society and thought  Vcough was just a very  bad cold and did not understand all the  fuss.

Tom finished his really really really really really exciting day at the supermarket and hoped never time see red and white  striped  tape again as his eyes were a bit fuzzy si he was glad to get home and listen  to  some tunes_oh my god that makes me sound  old well I am nearly sixty ;I should  say some 

music. 

Chapter 7

Tom was getting a bit weary  of the news as it felt like  he was in the film Groundhog Day_Phil, a self-centred weatherman, goes to the town of Punxsutawney for an assignment. He is later shocked when he wakes up the next morning and realises that he is reliving the same day over and over_ but Toms was PPE; Testing; Death Tolls :NHS ;Care Homes every single  day and what made the whole  situation  worse for  him was he could  not watch  his favourite football team win or lose on Match  Of The Day .

Vcough  was  very pleased  that he was responsible  for people  staying at home but was a bit pissed off by the those media  chaps or ladies as he is a political correct  virus 

Meanwhile  as the lock downs around the  world were  getting  into sixth week thier is a sign of anarchy and the greed of wanting  to earn money and some countries were experiencing protests  from  people  demanding  thier liberty and for the economy

to restart. 

People  beginning  to waver well just the normal  twenty per  cent  you now them as the idiots  who think  it never happened to me or its just a bit of flu.

Tom after watching  his  marathon  of box sets set about  his daily  exercise until  as he was doing a bicep curl_The biceps curl is a general title for a series of strength exercises that involve brachioradialis, front deltoid and the main target on biceps brachii. Includes variations using barbell, dumbbell and resistance band_weight on bar a mere 66  lbs which  he had been he thought back  over training  due to  boredom his left arm popped and now he has to rest  which is a another  reason to  him to stop critiquing  the idiot s as his wife  said he was  one too and for once  

he totally  agreed. 

Chapter 8 

Vcough  was starting  to think  he was losing  his battle but got surprised  by some apathy  among the hosts as thier talked  of economic recovery was now required as millions  were loss thier jobs .

Vcough liked the fact  that some  thought  he was not even  real and he turns to  me the writer and asks the following. 

"What direction are you  going as you seem  to be all over the place  with the plot to the  point I think you run out  of ideas  what to do,how am I going  to  conquer and be the worst  epidemic in history? "

Tom "Hey dude have  you  forgotten  I an your hero  of this book; not cool man"

Author ps that's me Mark Antony :ás a child  is hated my middle name so much  as when I was in junior  school  I was asked to play Mark Antony and kiss and girl  at this thought  I run out of the  class and school but I already  done a autobiography so to answer  your questions  Vcough and Tom I been having  writers  block ...Writer's block is a condition, primarily associated with writing, in which an author loses the ability to produce new work or experiences a creative slowdown. This loss of ability to write and produce new work is not a result of commitment problems or lack of writing skills. Wikipedia"

Both  Vcough and Tom reply. 

"So we here in limbo  still  in your  head  awaiting  for you  to carry on with  this  book  you  started  even  if  no one  reads it"

Author "Bit Harsh  but true "

At this point  I decided  to  stop writing  and recharge  my battery and write  the next  chapter  soon. 

Chapter 9

Tom was listening to  the  television  in the background before  his daily  one hour exercise per day ;as per usual  it was that man who is marmite  to marry :either  you love  or hate a certain Mr .Peirs  Morgan  who was plumping myself  like a peacock  about the daily  dig at the government  of the day.

But  dispite  the doom and gloom or as Private Fraser would  say in an old British Television Series Dads Army "We all Doomed"

A bit of side if information  for those readers whom may be interested. 

Dads Army _In World War II, with a German invasion looming, the defence of Walmington-on-Sea rests in the hands of the local bank manager and a motley collection of volunteers in the Home Guard unit. Despite being woefully ill-equipped, the rag-tag crew is ready to take on invading troops from across the Channel.

Tom decides to do a bit of voluntary work; to the reader yes text style change  due to unforeseen circumstances ie I messed up doh;back to  the corner for me wearing  my dunce hat with  a capital  D.

Tom goes to the local volunteers office were getting meets a blonde ;blue eyed ;buxom  woman with a voice like  listening  to chalk being scrapped  upon a blackboard. 

Tom joins Holsworthy Mutual Aid were he walks dogs :does shopping although  when dropping  it off at the doorstep the elderly  person : or he or she or maybe of neutral gender normally spend about  ten minutes  having a natter which  is ok but it involves a lot of speaking loudly due a wearing  a mask muffles his voice and b social distancing.;Tom also  collects thier medication which  means a lot of queueing; if queueing  was an Olympic sport we have a gold medal.

Meanwhile Vcough was  really  liking  the fact that the country of England was beginning  to open up again because  his powers were becoming weak due to people  being  goody two shoes; ps not the song by Adam Ant.

Vcough had a cunning plan hatching  in his brain. 

The next chapter  is going to be the last part  of this small book  or is it really  a novelette _According  to the font of all knowledge Wikipedia. ..a short novel, typically one that is light and romantic or sentimental in character.:etc  that I not got any romance or sentiment  in this book so I don't  know  why I add it in.

OK back to next Chapter. 

Chapter 10

This is what  is known as in the trade as the concluding chapter in plain English where  I rap the whole  story up .

I was unsure  in which way to  end this book but it watched a strange  Japanese man ja cartoon  or if you are posh animation way which  give me the idea how to  end it  

Hopefully it not going  to disappoint  you  like the end of the series Lost_The survivors of a plane crash find themselves stranded on a mysterious island. They are forced to work together for their survival when they realise that they are not alone on the island:which  took  the God ending and really  pissed  off a lot of fans 

Vcough had a cunning plan and it was to infect  our hero  Tom and mix with  his D.N.A to create a  totally  immune  human whom would  never show  any symptoms  of him despite all the  tests and this would  allow  to retravel  the globe reinfecting all those whom thought  survived.

Vcough would  give it to man only so that all was left were woman and children and to some this would  be the prefect  world. 

This is not the end just the  new world  we live in from the  year of  our Lord 2020