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Sunday 28 July 2019

Hectors Big Adventure Written and illustrations by Mark Antony Raines Comedy Friendly Zombie Ltd 2019 reissue

HECTOR
Once upon a time in a  land  far away  lived a boy called Hector , Hector  was on the way to see his mum Molly a elderly lady in her nineteen or she prefers a recycled teenager.So  he decided to take a short cut through the Woods  as dispite it's history of paranormal activity,u..f.o sightings  and British Bigfoot.





Woods.

It wasn't long before Hector got lost as he never was very good at geography at school as he liked to play the class folk as he found it as boring as watching wet paint drying  backwards. He looked around, but all he could see were trees,and more trees and more trees. Nervously, he felt into his bag for his favourite toy, Rags, but Rags was nowhere to be found!Rags was his one dared but tatty teddy bear he had since the age of five of was his comfort blanket. Hector began to panic,and heart beating like a drum . He felt sure he had packed Rags.,To make matters worse, he was starting to feel hungry as he forgot the most important part of the day Breakfast.

Rags.


Unexpectedly, he saw a scruffy frog dressed in a purple jumper disappearing into the trees,at this sight he stopped rigid on the spot as it was not often see a scruffy frog dressed in a purple jumper.

"How odd!" thought Hector with a slight twitch of his face similar to a tic in Tourettes Syndrome.



For the want of anything better to do, he decided to follow the peculiarly dressed frog as it may lead him to poor Rags. Perhaps it could  follow the purple wearing a purple jumper  the way out of the forest as it just a series of tree s to him.

Eventually, Hector reached a clearing. He found himself surrounded by houses made from different sorts of food ,how yummy for my tummy thought Hector inside his head. There was a house made from peas but not the mushy ones in chip shops , a house made from doughnuts Homer Simpson fav food in Hectors  most watched cartoon on his television, a house made from jelly babies  but no black ones as this was a political correct house and a house made from pizzas the cheese and tomato kind.

Hector could feel his tummy rumbling. Looking at the houses did nothing to ease his hunger.

"Hello!" he called. "Is anybody there?"  He cried out with a hint of nerves in his voice.




Big,Average,Small Frog.

Nobody replied.Mmm .

Hector looked at the roof on the closest house and wondered if it would be rude to eat somebody else's chimney as he was very very very very hungry. Obviously it would be impolite to eat a wholehouse as his mother had brought him up with good manners, but perhaps it would be considered acceptable to nibble the odd fixture or lick the odd fitting, in a time of need.

A cackle broke through the air, giving Hector a fright. A witch jumped into the space in front of the houses. She was carrying a cage. In that cage was Rags!,on no not Rags.

"Rags!" shouted Hector. He turned to the witch. "That's my friend !"

The witch just shrugged and let out a manic laugh.

"Give Rags back!" cried Hector.

"Not on your nelly!" He is mine now said the witch.

"At least let Rags out of that cage!" Says Hector.

Before she could reply, three scruffy frogs rushed in from a footpath on the other side of the clearing. Hector recognised the one in the purple jumper that he'd seen earlier. The witch seemed to recognise him too.

"Hello Big Frog," said the witch.

"Good morning." The frog noticed Rags. "Who is this?"

"That's Rags," explained the witch.

"Ooh! Rags would look lovely in my house. Give it to me!" demanded the frog.

The witch shook her head. "Rags is staying with me."

"Um... Excuse me..." Hector interrupted. "Rags lives with me! And not in a cage!"

Big Frog ignored him. "Is there nothing you'll trade?" he asked the witch.

The witch thought for a moment, then said, "I do like to be entertained. I'll release him to anybody who can eat a whole front door."









Witch.

Any of the Houses .

Big Frog looked at the house made from pizzas and said, "No problem, I could eat an entire house made from pizzas if I wanted to."

"That's nothing," said the next frog. "I could eat two houses."

"There's no need to show off," said the witch. Just eat one front door and I'll let you have Rags."says the Witch

Hector watched, feeling very worried. He didn't want the witch to give Rags to Big Frog. He didn't think Rags would like living with a scruffy frog, away from his house and all his other toys.

The other two frogs watched while Big Frog put on his bib and withdrew a knife and fork from his pocket,a bit odd but hey this a fable so anything is possible.

"I'll eat this whole house," said Big Frog. "Just you watch!"Bragging bigtime.

Big Frog pulled off a corner of the front door of the house made from doughnuts. He gulped it down smiling, and went back for more.

   And more.

      And more.

Eventually, Big Frog started to get bigger - just a little bit bigger at first. But after a few more fork-fulls of doughnuts, he grew to the size of a large snowball - and he was every bit as round.

"Erm... I don't feel too good," said Big Frog.

Suddenly, he started to roll. He'd grown so round that he could no longer balance!

"Help!" he cried, as he rolled off down a slope into the forest.

Big Frog never finished eating the front door made from doughnuts and Rags remained trapped in the witch's cage.

Average Frog stepped up, and approached the house made from jelly babies.

"I'll eat this whole house," said Average Frog. "Just you watch!"

Average Frog pulled off a corner of the front door of the house made from jelly babies. She gulped it down smiling, and went back for more.

   And more.

      And more.

After a while, Average Frog started to look a little queasy. She grew greener...

   ...and greener.

A woodcutter walked into the clearing. "What's this bush doing here.,then " he asked.

"I'm not a bush, I'm a frog!" said Average Frog.

"It talks!" exclaimed the woodcutter. "Those talking bushes are the worst kind. I'd better take it away before somebody gets hurt,as last time I came across a talking Bush it gives me such a hard time" .

"No! Wait!" cried Average Frog, as the woodcutter picked her up. But the woodcutter ignored her cries and carried the frog away under his arm,and carried her away into the distance.

Average Frog never finished eating the front door made from jelly babies and Rags remained trapped in the witch's cage.

Little Frog stepped up, and approached the house made from pizzas.

"I'll eat this whole house," said Little Frog. "Just you watch!"

Little Frog pulled off a corner of the front door of the house made from pizzas. He gulped it down smiling, and went back for more.

   And more.

      And more.

After five or six platefuls, Little Frog started to fidget uncomfortably on the spot.

He stopped eating pizzas for a moment, then grabbed another forkful.

But before he could eat it, there came an almighty roar. A bottom burp louder than a rocket taking off, propelled Little Frog into the sky.

"Aggghhhhhh!" cried Little Frog. "I'm scared of heigh..."Hector let out a hearty belly laugh as it sounded rude.

Little Frog was never seen again.

Little Frog never finished eating the front door made from pizzas and Rags remained trapped in the witch's cage.





Woodcutter.


"Not so fast," said Hector. "There is still one front door to go. The front door of the house made from peas. And I haven't had a turn yet.

"I don't have to give you a turn!" laughed the witch. "My game. My rules."

The woodcutter's voice carried through the forest. "I think you should give him a chance. It's only fair."

"Fine," said the witch. "But you saw what happened to the frogs. He won't last long."

"I'll be right back," said Hector.

"What?" said the witch. "Where's your sense of impatience? I thought you wanted Rags back."

Hector ignored the witch and gathered a hefty pile of sticks. He came back to the clearing and started a small camp fire. Carefully, he broke off a piece of the door of the house made from peas and toasted it over the fire. Once it had cooked and cooled just a little, he took a bite. He quickly devoured the whole piece.

Hector sat down on a nearby log.

"You fail!" cackled the witch. "You were supposed to eat the whole door."

"I haven't finished," explained Hector. "I am just waiting for my food to go down."

When Hector's food had digested, he broke off another piece of the door made from peas. Once more, he toasted his food over the fire and waited for it to cool just a little. He ate it at a leisurely pace then waited for it to digest.

Eventually, after several sittings, Hector was down to the final piece of the door made from peas. Carefully, he toasted it and allowed it to cool just a little. He finished his final course. Hector had eaten the entire front door of the house made from peas.

The witch stamped her foot angrily. "You must have tricked me!" she said. "I don't reward cheating!"

"I don't think so!" said a voice. It was the woodcutter. He walked back into the clearing, carrying his axe. "This little boy won fair and square. Now hand over Rags or I will chop your broomstick in half."

The witch looked horrified. She grabbed her broomstick and placed it behind her. Then, huffing, she opened the door of the cage.

Hector hurried over and grabbed Rags, checking that his favourite toy was all right. Fortunately, Rags was unharmed.

Hector thanked the woodcutter, grabbed a quick souvenir, and hurried on to meet Molly. It was starting to get dark.

When Hector got to Molly's house, his mum threw her arms around him.

"I was so worried!" cried Molly. "You are very late."

As Hector described his day, he could tell that Molly didn't believe him. So he grabbed a napkin from his pocket.




Hector unwrapped a doorknob made from doughnuts. "Pudding!" he said.


The End.




About the Author.
This  is my second children's book I hope you enjoyed it as much as you liked writing and drawing the illustrations.



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